[1ST DANCE] - Displaced

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

[Shirayuki has been spending a lot of time outside now that the snow has fallen. The wildlife doesn't seem pleased about it and all the birds she's come into contact with have done nothing but squawk irritably over it. It makes sense, she supposes, if it's not supposed to be this cold here. But she is very much enjoying it. It reminds her of home...

But even so, her situation is rather peculiar, and still she's not fully sure what to make of it. There are, at minimum, at least three other shinigami here, and their zanpakuto have not been separated from them. None at all. Only her. Why her? What made her special?

Maybe it was because it was possible with her. She had been unglued from Rukia before. Maybe it was simply just not possible with the others. Those bonds had never been severed as hers and Rukia's had. Maybe that's all the reason there was...

Shirayuki couldn't be sure. She was still bothered by it none the less, and she was dealing with that on top of various sources of guilt and the compulsive need to protect her master, even when they were separated like this.

She rest her face in one hand. She was getting a headache.]

...Perhaps a vacation from all of that fighting and worrying will do me some good.

Comments

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

What's that?

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

It wasn't so much about family as just bonds between people... I don't remember the precise wording. It was so long ago... but something about a heart being something formed between two people. On one's own, there isn't a heart.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

[He looks in surprise, he had never heard such a thing before.]

No heart...? How can that be? Everyone needs a heart to live. I know people can form a bond, but a heart? [Maybe there was a deeper meaning to it. Surely it couldn't be literally speaking, could it?]

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

I think in this context, a bond and a heart are the same. A heart is required to live... And a person cannot live in isolation.

Take my kind for example. If we are alone, we cannot function. A zanpakuto with no master has no purpose. It can be alive, but there is no life to it. It has no home, nothing to protect. No one to care for.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

Oh, that sounds like it would be very depressing, almost like being lost. Thank goodness you have miss Rukia, I hope you will never have to go through something like that.

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

I have been displaced from her, and forced into a semi-dormant state in the past. Both in quick succession actually. At least in regards to the former, I was able to protect her indirectly...

But now that I have returned to her, and we have begun to fight again, I cannot let myself fail her like that again.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

...Because you both rely on each other for strength and to survive?

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

In truth, I likely rely on her far more than she does me.

My failings are not so great that I do not deserve her, but the fact that I could have let such hardships befall her is something I berate myself for.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

From what I was told, I don't think miss Rukia would abandon you for that. Everyone makes mistakes, I'm sure she doesn't expect you to be perfect.

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

No no... She's such a good girl... She doesn't blame me for a thing, even if she could. She'd never place blame on anyone else. Unfortunately, she places too much blame on herself.

But that is why my failings are so truly unforgivable. Because of my failings, she puts blame on herself. She hurts because I could not better protect her.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

But...you can still protect her. You can practice and get better, that way when the time comes to protect her again, you'll be able to do it.

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

We have come far since my failings... But even with how much stronger we have gotten... I nearly lost her again.

[She exhales, seeming a bit frustrated for a moment.]

And I can bet I owe that Kurosaki boy another round of thanks for saving her again...

[She's really not sure if she likes Ichigo or not.]

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

It sounds like you don't like that person very much...

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

I am... undecided.... on my opinion of Kurosaki Ichigo.

He has done many things for my master. She has begun to recover because of him.

But he has also caused problems.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

Ohh...

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

[She smiles and shakes her head.]

Kurosaki Ichigo is a good person. His intentions are noble.

He is just not very intelligent.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

[He laughs a little at that]

Does he act before he thinks?

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

[She lets out a soft laugh.]

You know the type then?

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

[He smiles.]

In a way, yes. Taking action before trying to think things through. It not always a good thing to do...but still.

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

[She laughs and nods.]

Yes, that's the type.

It was horribly frustrating for Zangetsu and I while I was there...

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

It sounds like it was tough for you. But, you can take a break from things like that and fighting, right?

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

It was disorienting, but at the very least, I was able to aid Zangetsu in aiding Kurosaki, and in doing so was able to indirectly protect Rukia-sama.

Yes.... I am glad for that much at least. When I arrived here, we were on the verge of war. We were engaged in a rescue and it was not going well...

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

[His eyes widened a bit.]

Oh no--you were pulled away from a rescue mission?

[thebravestbird.insanejournal.com]

It is best I was taken when I was. We were... not in a good position. Though it seems we make it out all right.

One of Rukia-sama's friends was taken by the enemy. But I think, somehow, time is unaffected by this place. So I am not concerned.

[watersprout.insanejournal.com]

[He's still worried but...]

Oh, I see. That means you still can help them when you go back if time hasn't passed by since you left, right?